Grandparenting Challenges: Identifying Windows of Influence

Grandparents are more than a loving presence in a child’s life. You are also a bridge between the past and future, helping children understand their roots, values, and faith traditions. Proverbs 17:6 says, “Children’s children are a crown to the aged.” Your wisdom, life experiences, and consistent presence provide stability, especially in a world filled with uncertainty.

Even simple conversations with grandchildren—like talking about your own childhood, faith journey, or favorite Bible verses—can offer them a sense of belonging and continuity. These small interactions weave together a family narrative that helps them understand who they are and how they fit into God’s larger story. Your influence isn’t just emotional—it’s spiritual, too. As Deuteronomy 6:6-9 instructs parents to teach God’s commandments throughout everyday moments, grandparents can join in this mission. Whether you’re discussing God’s faithfulness while on a walk or sharing Scripture during breakfast, these daily interactions carry eternal significance.

The Challenges Grandparents Face

While the role of a grandparent is deeply meaningful, it isn’t without challenges. In today’s fast-paced world, family dynamics and busy schedules can sometimes make it difficult to stay involved. Here are some of the common obstacles grandparents face—and how you can overcome them:

1. Physical Distance: Many families are spread across states or even countries, limiting in-person visits. Staying connected through phone calls, video chats, or texts becomes essential. Regular contact, even if virtual, helps maintain a sense of closeness.
2. Health and Mobility Issues: As we age, physical limitations can make it harder to attend events or keep up with energetic grandchildren. However, sharing stories, reading books together, or having meaningful conversations from the comfort of home can still nurture the relationship.
3. Different Parenting Styles: Sometimes, adult children may raise their kids differently than you did. This can lead to misunderstandings or disagreements. Rather than letting these differences create distance, focus on supporting their parenting choices while offering your unique wisdom with love and grace.
4. Busy Schedules: Kids today often have packed schedules filled with school, sports, and other activities. Finding windows of time to connect might require creativity, such as sending encouraging notes or scheduling regular video calls.
5. Technology Barriers: In an increasingly digital world, some grandparents may struggle to use tools like social media or video calls. With a little effort (and maybe help from a grandchild!), these tools can become a powerful way to maintain meaningful connections, even across long distances.

Recognizing these challenges helps you set realistic expectations for yourself and your role, enabling you to build strong relationships even when obstacles arise.

Seizing “Windows of Influence”

The concept of “windows of influence” is about identifying moments, however small, when your presence, words, or actions can leave a lasting impact on your grandchildren. These windows are opportunities to speak life, offer guidance, and demonstrate love and faith. Whether they’re structured or spontaneous, these moments carry significant weight.

Each interaction—no matter how small—contributes to building a foundation of love and trust that will make a lasting impression.

A Story of Influence: Grandpa Bill and Carl

Bill was a grandfather who lived a few hours away from his 12-year-old grandson, Carl. Visits were rare, and Bill often worried that the distance would prevent him from making a real connection. But Bill decided to be intentional with his time.

On one visit, Carl shared his dream of becoming a scientist. Bill listened carefully and asked follow-up questions about his grandson’s favorite experiments. Recognizing a window of influence, Bill shared how his own love for science had deepened his faith in God.

“The Bible says, ‘The heavens declare the glory of God’ (Psalm 19:1),” John told Michael. “Science helps us discover the amazing things God created, and every discovery shows us more about His greatness.”

This simple conversation sparked something in Carl. From that moment on, he began looking forward to his time with Grandpa Bill, who always asked him thoughtful questions and encouraged him to explore his passions through the lens of faith.

Bill’s intentional efforts turned their visits into meaningful experiences that shaped Carl’s faith and gave him the confidence to pursue his dreams.

Leaving a Legacy that Echoes Through Generations

Your influence as a grandparent may not always feel immediate, but every prayer, every question, and every shared moment builds a legacy that lasts. By seizing moments of influence and building strong relationships, you pass down more than just knowledge—you pass down faith, values, and love. Your presence in your grandchild’s life teaches them what it means to live a God-honoring life, and your influence will continue to echo through their choices, relationships, and faith journeys.

To learn more about Dr. Scott Turansky’s book entitled Grandparenting With Purpose, go here.